The power of connection

"There are people I meet like this, every once in a while, who have the power to transform my energy"

Dear fellow human,

The other morning I walked along the river with Alfie. It was early, maybe 7am. The sun had only just started to rise so the air was cool, which was a welcome relief. An inexplicable energy fuelled a skip in my step. You know when there’s something in the air that feeds your soul?

I had a flask of tea and a book in my bag. I didn’t know where I was going to stop to read, but upon walking past a flight of steps down to the bank of the river I felt called to sit down. The breeze through the trees, the water lapping on the beach, and the faint sound of joggers running behind me combined, filling my ears with a joyful hum. As furry four-legged friends ran down the tow path behind where we were sat, Alfie poked his nose over my shoulder to see if he could say hello.

I was fumbling around in my bag for my flask and book when I heard a cheery ‘morning’. Without turning around I hollered ‘oh good morning!’ back. You see, I am like a golden retriever. If anyone says hello to me I will enthusiastically respond without hesitation. As I turned to see who it was I instantly recognised the man’s dog: a golden labrador with the kindest brown eyes you’ve ever seen. Immediately I knew who the man was. I wondered if he would remember me.

He didn’t seem to. I’d only met him once before, in this exact spot actually, so I decided to let him off the hook.

About three months previously, at the start of the summer, we walked past each other on the same stretch of river. We stopped to say a polite hello, as dog walkers do. After parting ways I experienced one of the scariest moments of my life: Alfie disappeared. One minute he was in my line of vision, the next minute he wasn’t. I couldn’t see him. I couldn’t hear him. I was terrified.

My heart dropped into my stomach and tears immediately started streaming down my cheeks. I am usually self-conscious in public but dog-mum mode kicked in and I started shouting for help. Five minutes later Alfie was still nowhere to be seen and none of the runners who passed me were willing to stop and help search. I didn’t want to move too far because they say your dog will always come back to where they last saw you. I was trying to persuade myself that he had just seen a duck and chased after it, or followed another dog a little too far upstream, and that he would weave his way back to me any moment. Even so, I couldn’t shift the intrusive thought that I might never see him again.

Between my cries for him, ‘Alfie! Alfie! Alfie!’ I eventually heard a man shout ‘I’ve got him!’. By this point I was on the edge of the beach, about to dive into the river. I scrambled up the stairs back to the tow path where my eyes met with the same gentleman I had casually chatted with just 15 minutes before.

I couldn’t see Alfie with him, but the man kept reassuring me that he’d found him and that Alfie would be on his way shortly. I remember thinking ‘is he joking, how does he know Alfie is on his way?’. The man was so calm. Sure enough, as I looked past his shoulder I saw Alfie running full pelt down the tow path back towards us. As Alfie rubbed up against my legs I could tell he had scared himself. I gave him a big hug. I didn’t care that he was covered in river water, mud, and god knows what else. I think it was the first and only time I’ve ever seen Alfie smile.

As I stood back up to thank him, the man let out a little chuckle, smiled, and said ‘they’re little devils aren’t they’. His energy instantaneously diffused my alarm. Within minutes I felt as though what had been a traumatic event had been transformed into a beautiful experience. There are people I meet like this, every once in a while, who have the power to transform my energy.

So when I saw this man again earlier this week I couldn’t help but tell him that I recognised him as the man who had saved my dog months earlier. I was actually recording a video at the exact moment I bumped into him for the second time in the same place. It makes for a heart-warming watch (for me at least).

I find it easy to focus on the moments of disconnect I experience with other people. It is no surprise given my experiences as a neurodivergent person. They have made me cautious, critical, and closed off more often than not. This man reminded me that there are people in life with whom I do connect instantly. Regardless of age, sex, or location, there are people out there who receive my energy and hold it with care. These moments of connection are so powerful; they remind me to keep a soft heart for those who hold it lightly.

Sending you love,

Charlie ♡