I am she! She is me! Stuck there right now. In the molasses (as I think Sylvia Path described), but knowing my capabilities are just sitting in abeyance until my capacity and energy returns. Hopefully soon, but inevitably at some point ❤️🔥
It's really interesting to read other experiences of what being stuck with ADHD paralysis feels like. For myself, I called them my "anxious days," where all I could do was sit or lay in bed, but the anxiety of not getting up to do the things I needed to would sit really heavy on my chest. Thank you for sharing your experience with this Charlie!
Totally relate to the heavy anxiety feeling - I think that is a byproduct of the ADHD paralysis for me, I get so stuck in my head and the anxiety can quickly spiral into questioning everything about my life! Thank you for reading and sharing, Amber ♡
This was me last week I felt stuck and trapped. It was frustrating and exhausting in and of itself and I spent hours in bed doing nothing but it was all I felt I could do.
I am pretty much exactly the same, I have major autistic inertia and ADHD paralysis and simultaneously need routine and structure and to get some of the things out of the head and at least into the body or checked off the list but it all battles each other and leaves me very much stuck in the middle, solo in a mental prison no one can see or help me with. (This is where I stick both middle fingers up on each hand and swear at the infuriating madness of it in a fit of frustration)
I hope by now communicating it, it helps shift some of it for you and with the validation/solidarity here we can help fill in a little of the compassion for yourself.
(I wouldn't wish ADHD paralysis on anyone but I want to thank you for sharing your experience and feelings because it helps to know that it's not a unique experience, especially in the thick of it when no matter how hard I try to remind myself that it's 'just' the ADHD it feels as though I'm losing the plot)
Plots have a way of turning around in the end, it's just no fun in the middle and the dark.
I've started trying to think of it like a cold, you feel rubbish and like it's never going to end then one day you just wake up and you can breathe and your heads clear and your ok again. (But that might be also cause I've had a cold all week so it's been top of mind)
My best guess at what was happening before I discovered Audhd inertia/paralysis was that deep down I REALLY didn't want to do all the stuff I couldn't get up and do (or rather there was something about the whole way of life that the small actions I couldn't complete were supporting that I didn't want). And/or I needed to "do" from a more authentic/present place than my usual "habitual doing" because the shaming ("Muppet committee" 😁) inner critic said so. I guess I still feel this has a part to play. When I let anger out that often helps me move again... A little Rage Against the Machine sometimes helps (reminded of your throwback CD buying Charlie 😊).
I didn’t even know this was a thing but I’ve been in this for weeks. All I can do is the one thing that brings me comfort which is gaming. Other than doing that I’m stuck. I physically and mentally cannot do anything else. My mind won’t let me but I get frustrated and angry because I don’t really want to be doing the one thing I’m stuck doing. It’s like walking on a treadmill, every day the same thing but not actually going anywhere.
Just recognising the hours of my life that have passed me by whilst I summon the magic ingredient (whatever it is) that then makes me go into overdrive to get things done. Not necessarily the original things, or even the most important things (though often the most important will be done), but definitely things - and just getting going often means I can then carry on with the things that remain necessary (or chosen) - as obviously some of the things will have become irrelevant 🙃🙂
So well expressed the everything and all at same volume! Do you get the he thing where everything you look at triggers things to do, something to buy, clean, forgot to do cook, clean or decide🙃
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 46. I’ve spent most of my adult life believing I was lazy and depressed. Although I now know what it is I’m struggling to execute everyday tasks and it’s impossible to set goals. I can’t work and I’m a bit overwhelmed by this. Doing my best to move forward.
Thank you all for sharing your stuff, it helps me so much to hear it, to see I'm not alone and "making it up".
One thing I'm "in" at the moment is anger and grief about this (adhd paralysis) not being recognised by any of the therapists I've subjected myself to over the years. I know the research wasn't there for them to draw on. Feel so much grief for the 15 year old, the 20 year old, the 27 year old, the 32 year old who went looking for help in crisis and was then subjected to hours of excruciating and ultimately pointless self-examination and reliving of trauma. I can feel that I will walk forward from this stronger but it really sucks to be in it!
I’m curious, what’s the difference between ADHD paralysis and autistic inertia? According to my diagnosis, I’m autistic but only met three of nine criteria for ADHD. But this morning I was going through exactly what you all have described. Mind racing with things I need to do but no ability to make a single decision, which ended with my husband getting me started and helping me with one major task. However, I seem to run into this a lot. I know my executive functioning is not optimal, so I tend to attribute this feeling to it. But that feeling of stuck-ness and anxiety around it is so familiar!
This is an interesting question and one I'm going to dive into myself but if it was able to be traced back to a source (each of them) it would probably be generated by something a little different and can be 'resolved' or moved out of difficulty. There is a very good (albeit long) research study on autistic inertia which is worth a read if not already, and in those examples an external driver was usually the only way to break the inertia I.e. partner gets you started or helps. I haven't read as much on ADHD paralysis but for me personally, unlike inertia I don't feel like an external driver could help in that instance. This is purely personal experience and I'm going to go back to that and see if I can find anything similar on ADHD paralysis but that's my current view on it.
I am she! She is me! Stuck there right now. In the molasses (as I think Sylvia Path described), but knowing my capabilities are just sitting in abeyance until my capacity and energy returns. Hopefully soon, but inevitably at some point ❤️🔥
Thank you for sharing 🥰
And thank you for your solidarity 🥰
It's really interesting to read other experiences of what being stuck with ADHD paralysis feels like. For myself, I called them my "anxious days," where all I could do was sit or lay in bed, but the anxiety of not getting up to do the things I needed to would sit really heavy on my chest. Thank you for sharing your experience with this Charlie!
Totally relate to the heavy anxiety feeling - I think that is a byproduct of the ADHD paralysis for me, I get so stuck in my head and the anxiety can quickly spiral into questioning everything about my life! Thank you for reading and sharing, Amber ♡
Yes that's exactly what it feels like! I tend to refer to it as existential dread, just sitting there worrying about everything I'm doing "wrong"
This was me last week I felt stuck and trapped. It was frustrating and exhausting in and of itself and I spent hours in bed doing nothing but it was all I felt I could do.
I am pretty much exactly the same, I have major autistic inertia and ADHD paralysis and simultaneously need routine and structure and to get some of the things out of the head and at least into the body or checked off the list but it all battles each other and leaves me very much stuck in the middle, solo in a mental prison no one can see or help me with. (This is where I stick both middle fingers up on each hand and swear at the infuriating madness of it in a fit of frustration)
I hope by now communicating it, it helps shift some of it for you and with the validation/solidarity here we can help fill in a little of the compassion for yourself.
Fist bump - appreciate you as always 😊
Fist bump right back at you :)
(I wouldn't wish ADHD paralysis on anyone but I want to thank you for sharing your experience and feelings because it helps to know that it's not a unique experience, especially in the thick of it when no matter how hard I try to remind myself that it's 'just' the ADHD it feels as though I'm losing the plot)
Plots have a way of turning around in the end, it's just no fun in the middle and the dark.
I've started trying to think of it like a cold, you feel rubbish and like it's never going to end then one day you just wake up and you can breathe and your heads clear and your ok again. (But that might be also cause I've had a cold all week so it's been top of mind)
My best guess at what was happening before I discovered Audhd inertia/paralysis was that deep down I REALLY didn't want to do all the stuff I couldn't get up and do (or rather there was something about the whole way of life that the small actions I couldn't complete were supporting that I didn't want). And/or I needed to "do" from a more authentic/present place than my usual "habitual doing" because the shaming ("Muppet committee" 😁) inner critic said so. I guess I still feel this has a part to play. When I let anger out that often helps me move again... A little Rage Against the Machine sometimes helps (reminded of your throwback CD buying Charlie 😊).
Ooooo letting anger out - that's such an interesting point!! I'll pay attention to that.
I didn’t even know this was a thing but I’ve been in this for weeks. All I can do is the one thing that brings me comfort which is gaming. Other than doing that I’m stuck. I physically and mentally cannot do anything else. My mind won’t let me but I get frustrated and angry because I don’t really want to be doing the one thing I’m stuck doing. It’s like walking on a treadmill, every day the same thing but not actually going anywhere.
🫂 I'm sorry you're struggling with this too Sarah - its endlessly frustrating. 💖
Just recognising the hours of my life that have passed me by whilst I summon the magic ingredient (whatever it is) that then makes me go into overdrive to get things done. Not necessarily the original things, or even the most important things (though often the most important will be done), but definitely things - and just getting going often means I can then carry on with the things that remain necessary (or chosen) - as obviously some of the things will have become irrelevant 🙃🙂
So well expressed the everything and all at same volume! Do you get the he thing where everything you look at triggers things to do, something to buy, clean, forgot to do cook, clean or decide🙃
Ohhhhh yesssss!!! Suddenly I 'see' everything but can't 'do' those things 🫠
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 46. I’ve spent most of my adult life believing I was lazy and depressed. Although I now know what it is I’m struggling to execute everyday tasks and it’s impossible to set goals. I can’t work and I’m a bit overwhelmed by this. Doing my best to move forward.
I feel this so much especially when the tasks I need to do don't excite me... Everyday boring tasks life admin, cleaning, washing house stuff...
Yes!! And even my usual techniques of trying to make those things the lightest bit interesting or fun don't work!
Thank you all for sharing your stuff, it helps me so much to hear it, to see I'm not alone and "making it up".
One thing I'm "in" at the moment is anger and grief about this (adhd paralysis) not being recognised by any of the therapists I've subjected myself to over the years. I know the research wasn't there for them to draw on. Feel so much grief for the 15 year old, the 20 year old, the 27 year old, the 32 year old who went looking for help in crisis and was then subjected to hours of excruciating and ultimately pointless self-examination and reliving of trauma. I can feel that I will walk forward from this stronger but it really sucks to be in it!
I hear you Winn 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
I’m curious, what’s the difference between ADHD paralysis and autistic inertia? According to my diagnosis, I’m autistic but only met three of nine criteria for ADHD. But this morning I was going through exactly what you all have described. Mind racing with things I need to do but no ability to make a single decision, which ended with my husband getting me started and helping me with one major task. However, I seem to run into this a lot. I know my executive functioning is not optimal, so I tend to attribute this feeling to it. But that feeling of stuck-ness and anxiety around it is so familiar!
This is an interesting question and one I'm going to dive into myself but if it was able to be traced back to a source (each of them) it would probably be generated by something a little different and can be 'resolved' or moved out of difficulty. There is a very good (albeit long) research study on autistic inertia which is worth a read if not already, and in those examples an external driver was usually the only way to break the inertia I.e. partner gets you started or helps. I haven't read as much on ADHD paralysis but for me personally, unlike inertia I don't feel like an external driver could help in that instance. This is purely personal experience and I'm going to go back to that and see if I can find anything similar on ADHD paralysis but that's my current view on it.
*moved out of differently
Thanks, Casper. Looks like I’ll have to do more research, too.